Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Tuesday Truth

There is a solution... For me, recovery is just that simple. Accepting that however, was an entirely different matter.

The local M,W,F noon AA meeting now reads from and discusses the "Big Book" of Alcoholics Anonymous. I got to chair the meeting yesterday, and becuase we had some very early sobriety folks in the meeting, I chose Chapter Two "There is a Solution." I was taken back to my early days, when God was a four-letter-word, and AA was some kind of brainwashing operation. Of course, it turns out I was right, AA IS brainwashing, and my brain needed a damn good scrubbing!

The good news for me and countless other addicts/alcoholics is that in order to recovery, only the smalllest amount of willingness andd open-mindedness can be sufficient to make a beginning. I had a relationship with God, I knew my life was a disaster zone and I had a hunch that maybe my drinking and drug use might have something to do with it. I certainly was NOT an alcoholic when I nervously arrived at my first meeting. But, I had this tiny shred of open-mindedness, and the AA's I met helped me pry the rusty gates of my self-centered, beer soaked, marijuana fogged mind apart, that I might realize that I am indeed at the mercy of my addictions.

Reading Chapter Two early on provided me with one of the first tangible pieces of evidence that those AA's might be on to something. I was told that I would find my own story within the Pages of "alcoholics Anonymoous" and they were correct. I could relate to much off the thinking and behaviour described in "There is a Solution." I defied however, the notion that I'd need to become fully reliant upon a Power greater than Scott. I hung on to that one for a loooooong time. Don't get me wrong, it was alright to rely upon HP (AA, at the time, early on) to help me stay dry. But, I really could manage all my other affairs, thank you very much.

Thankfully for me, all it took was a bare beginning, a willingness to consider some of the tried and true principles of our life-changing program. I am confident that the same bare beginnings can affect profound change for almost anyone. That's the good news I am reminded of each time I read Chapter Two. The meeting yesterday really took me back, gave me gratitude and a wonderful spiritual recharge.

4 comments:

drybottomgirl said...

You are so right! What a difference it makes to have a small bit of openenss. If you give God a crack he will open it wide and change your life forever! Hope you and your family have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Mary Christine said...

Happy Thanksgiving Scott.

Syd said...

There is a solution for each of us. Thankfully. Have a grateful Thanksgiving.

KB said...

We all need those gentle reminders at times. Glad yours gave you the recharge you needed.