Saturday, March 17, 2007

tuff, challenging times

Boy, oh boy... the things going on in the mortgage market and real estate market are having their effects on my business. We've arrived at "gut-check" time. Things are getting really thin financially and if we cannot find ways to make gains here shortly, I may have to look at the possibility of closing up shop. I hate to even think along those lines, but I have to be sensible and rational. I am not a quitter, but I have to figure out how long I can hang on and keep doing what I am doing.

In the mean time, I am reading alot, praying alot, consulting my mom and dad and other friends for advice and support. My wife is really having a hard time with all of this. She's mad that things aren't going our way, sh's kinda seeing this as "the end of the world" so to speak and really just over-reacting. We've got the means to keep ourselves afloat for an indefinite period of times through some investments and credit we have at our disposal. While that's not the way to go through life, you simply have to do what you have to do to keep the ship afloat while you work to improve the income situation. Thankfully, spending isn't the problem, income is the problem. We have a modest home and lifestyle as it is and we like it that way. That's what's enabled us to go as long as we have with a start up business and get by. The only debt we have is business related (aside from some credit card leftovers from Christmas and last yr's trip out west.) We're just in a real tight spot and it's time to evaluate the facts and find some rational, sensible solutions to get back ahead of the game. I am looking at picking up some part-time work somewhere to get something coming in the door while we ride out the slow mortgage market. I am blessed that I have the ability to create my own schedule. I can cut the office time down considerably and still handle a fair amount of loan volume, which would enable me to pick up some second shift or weekend work. So, that's my game plan thus far...

My main thing right now is to work hard at keeping positive, peaceful, focussed and rational. I know my wife loves me, she doesn't blame me, nor is she mad at me. But, it seems at times like I am on a bit of an island emotionally when it comes to stuff like this. I sorta have to handle it myself while she struggles to keep herself together. It's difficult enough on here with the normal everyday life stuff, but when we get in a difficult situation, she really comes apart. I certainly have no right or desire to judge her, hell it's not that long ago that I had difficulty seeing the bright side of things. But thanks to blogging, prayer, church, AA, retreats, books, you guys, my family, etc...I have come to a place in life (very thankfully) where I can attain some reasonable measure of peace with what's going on. At least enough to stay sane and work on a solution. My only wish is that my wife (for her sake, mine and Ian's ) could do the same. But, she is simply not in that place right now. So, I am working hard at being patient, non judgemental, supportive and accepting of her. After all, this sucks, it's scary and difficult. But, I know in my heart of hearts that The Lord can get us through this with faith and prayer and hard work. And I know that getting upset or miserable over this simply won't help. I refuse to give in to negativity and depression and anger at this point. I am thanking God right now all the time for the gift of a shred of positive attitude and faith.

Prayer for today...

HP/JC/God... Stuff sucks right now, in large measure, lol But, I know in my heart of hearts that as long as I come to you with my sins, fears, hopes and prayers You will carry us through. I know things don't always work out the way I see them happening or the way I think they should. I have learned that that's usually a good thing, lol. Thank You for calling those times to my mind. I pray that I continue to lay my stuff at Your feet, seek Your Will and try to live my life a close to You as possible. I pray for continued peace of mind, for the strength to seek out solutions and make good decisions. I pray that You guide my thinking, that I try my best to open my heart to You more fully each day. I pray for my wife... I ask Your Blessings for her, whatever she may need. I pray that I accept where she is, and do nothing to make her situation more difficult that it already is. Thank You God for AA, recovery, Your Son Jesus, the Church, my wife and son, all my friends and this bloggage.

God's peace be with you all...

7 comments:

Noor Azman Othman GBE said...

I'm really sorry to hear what's happening now but hang in there, my friend. I'm sure God will be with you.

lushgurl said...

What a beautiful post Scott,I know that times are tough, but look at you all positive and stuff!!
Today You (probably) have everything you need and you hafta believe that God WILL provide . Way to go and thanks for sharing...
HUGS

dAAve said...

Great words of wonderful wisdom. Remember that your HP has not brought you along this far just to let you go. It's all about Faith.

Mary Christine said...

God must have something really great in store for you!

Gwen said...

This is gonna be long but I have to share it. I have it taped to my monitor. It is from my sponsor.

"There will be times when you will not see the immediate way ahead. You may be filled with panic, wanting to avoid what could be a disastrous step. Remember you do not always need to see the road ahead. It is sufficient, for the moment, to see ME!

When the time is right for a choice to be made, you will know and I will assist you through it. Until that time, be sure that merely keeping close to me guarantees that you are moving in the right direction, despite questions and doubts raging in your mind.

When you cannot see clerly the next step, there is a good reason for My withholding that awareness....Do not feel the awful responsibility for choosing your path when that is not necessary for the moment. Just hide in Myself and know that you will soon see clearly....Until then, you are precisely where I want you to be."

Whhooosh. That seemed like forever typing that out.

Have a great week Scott~

Scott W said...

"Stuff sucks right now, in large measure". We experience life through our thoughts, so if you think it sucks then it will. This is an area where I have focused a lot of attention and I find when I give gratitude in advance I have the experience of having, not wanting. Just a thought. Good luck with your business.

Redhead Gal said...

I really like Gwen's comment. I am praying for you and your wife, Scott.

Your faith inspires me.