Monday, February 27, 2012

news and gratitude

Mom's surgery was Friday morning.   Long story short, Friday was one of the most difficult days of my life.  About an hour after coming out to tell us everything was great, the surgeon returned, took us (my step-dad, step bro and me) in a side room to tell us that she wasn't coming back out of surgery well.  They were having problems with a very low blood pressure, and she wasn't waking up well enough to remove the breathing tube/ventilator.  He said "we have several really goo people working on your mom, but I have to be honest, she is very sick right now, and we don't know what the problem is."  He then went back to work on mom and we sat there for 45 of the longest minutes of my life.  He came back out later long enough to say that they are taking her to surgical ICU, she is still struggling but she's a little better, not stabilized but a little better.

We then waited over 3 hrs for the next update (which was supposed to come within an hour).  Finally, the ICU doc came out to tell us that they were still fighting with mom's BP and she wasn't waking up well.  He told us that she "coded" in post op and they had to do chest compressions and all that.  He said they couldn't find any bleeding, couldn't explain the BP issues but that the surgeon's partner would be working on her, that they may go back to the OR and re-open.

After about an hour, the second surgeon came out and said they got her stabilized, had to do some additional suturing to get her BP back but that we'd be able to see her after awhile.  We got to see her twice before 5:30 pm (she was originally to be out and taking visitors by 11am), the second time she was partially awake, still with the breathing tube and on the ventilator.  I ended up staying overnight on Friday so I could see her Saturday before going home.  While I went to my old homegroup in Toledo Fri night (thank God it was a Fri nite), my step dad and bro stayed home and drank heavily.  I returned to that little party and hung out 'til collapsing around 10:30 pm (we had been up since 3:30 am).

Saturday she was sitting up, eating a little bit and able to talk and visit.  The removed the breathing tube late Fri nite and she's now in a regualr room.  So, all's well that ends well, but it wasn't any fun getting to this point.  Now we wait to hear about the extent of her cancer.  They removed the upper lobe of her right lung where the cancerous mass was located, and they are doing tests and a biopsy to determine if the cancer is in her lymph nodes or not.  We should know today.

I've been blessed with fairly healthy parents, and I have never had to go through something like what we all dealt with on Friday.  Thank God for that AA meeting.  I was able to see some old friends, laugh and just decompress without the slightest urge to drink.  I was also able to go home and deal with drinking family members.  We are praying for good news, we are praying prayers of gratitude that today's news even matters, after Friday.  It is so good to be calm, sane and sober through that experience.  I was able to be there for my step-dad and not be ranting and raving.  God helped me be calm, He helped me listen to the docs and help my step-dad make sense of what was happening.

This is just another thing to be grateful for in my life.

8 comments:

Jeremy said...

Keeping all of you in my prayers,

Mary Christine said...

I am glad your mom made it through. That must have been very difficult for you. Thank God we are sober to face these things that life presents. I am certain you are a blessing in your mother's life.

dAAve said...

Bless you and your family.
It's difficult. The not knowing is the hardest. I once heard that God made the earth round so we won't know what's around the corner. Really?

One more chance to experience life on life's terms. Literally.

Elizabeth said...

Friday sounded very, very scary and stressful. You really handled yourself with such grace. It is so amazing to hear or read stories like yours, going through such an experience and not having the desire to drink through it, thanks to AA and faith in your Higher Power.

Thank you for sharing your experience, strength and hope.

Praying for you and your family.

Furtheron said...

Scott - what a awful experience. Thanks for sharing... although I've lost both my parents now it is another example to me of something someone working the programme doesn't have to drink on... thereby removing my excuse ... thanks and best wishes for the rest of a complete recovery for your Mum.

SoberMomRocks said...

Thank you so much for sharing something so personal and painful. I will keep you all in my prayers. Congrats on staying sober as well - isn't it the best?

Oh...and remember to take care of yourself during this time as well.

Take care...Sherry

Marcia said...

Glad God was there to help you stay calm and to listen...

Syd said...

I surely am glad that she is okay. And great news about the biopsy too. I am glad that you were able to go to your meeting and find what you needed there.