Saturday, February 03, 2007

bam...

"Come away by yourselves to a deserted place and rest awhile." -Mark 6:31

I can sure attest to the value in that! This came from a daily devotional I have been reading for the past month or so. The following paragraph goes on to discuss the need for us to take time away from our busy lives and make a retreat, in order to gain perspective and nourish ourselves in the sunlight of the spirit.

I have come to really rely upon the times I get to make retreats, usually in the fall and over the winter. I love being able to spend a weekend reflecting, enjoying fellowship, TONS of prayer and meditation, lots of meetings and discussion. The first retreat I had ever gone on (against my early sobriety/better judgement, of course, lol) really changed the course of my recovery. In meditation, my eyes were really opened to the depth of my personal destruction, I learned that I had a TON of feelings that needed to come out either in tears, anger or on paper. It really set me on the path to self-discovery and a closer relationship to HP/God.

Interestingly enough, I went on retreat a couple weekends ago and have been in a bit of an emotional funk ever since it began. I mean, I enjoyed the quiet weekend when I wasn't handling the necessary tasks of one who's helping his sponsee chair the weekend. I came home in good spirits, in peace, and that even lasted through the insanity of a birthday party I took my son to at a local bowling alley. But, once I settled back into the routine of my life it's like I sent my serenity packing to some extent. I have noticed my temper getting shorter and my stress level getting higher. My tolerance for what's going on with my wife is reaching an all-time low (not necessarily all her fault, I have my part). It's weird, it's like I am peaceful and serene until something goes awry, then my temper tries to kick in. So, I think I shall resolve to try to take some time each day in contemplative meditation (gee just like the Steps suggest) and see where that gets me. Ya know, I am going to all these meetings and RCIA classes and even reading alot but spiritual growth and serenity are still inside jobs. I can do all that necessary external stuff I want, but if I don't apply it to my prayer/meditation life, I am not reaping the full rewards. So, it's time (as Emeril might say) to take it up another notch! (bam...)

Prayer for today...

God/HP/JC... please help me to stay sober today... just for today. I pray that I might take time to spend just with You, to keep perspective and focus on my relationship with You. Help me today to be thoughtful of those around me, to be patient and tolerant of those about me, and to remember that I am here to serve You and my fellow human. I give myself over to Your Will today, that You might use me for Your good works. I pray that I am open to receive and transmit Your Good News this morning in the jail mtg. and throughout the day.

y'all have a peaceful Saturday!

2 comments:

Noor Azman Othman GBE said...

I guess you're right. I need to make a retreat from my busy lives lately.

Happy Saturday.

Shannon said...

Good Morning Scott, I can so relate. For me, when I start getting like that... its because I am not taking care of myself... meaning, not sleeping enough, or putting too much pressure on myself, and yes take time to rest and meditate... I love R & R...
Have a good relaxing weekend Scotty. It will pass, : )
(((((HUGS))))))