Wednesday, April 28, 2010

reconciliation with myself

I don't recall if I posted on this or not so I guess I'll just share it lol. I was asked over the winter by our local high schoool band director if I'd be interesting in being his Assistant Marching Band Director for this summer/fall season. Of course I told him heck yes! I have been given the position and the supplemental teaching contract that goes along with it. Music is part of me, it's who I am along with being an alcoholic, a dad, husband, friend, son and servant. So needless to say, I am thrilled that I'll finally be doing "what I am supposed to be doing," teaching music to kids. And the really great thing is that I will be paid to do so.

There is a little down side in that this will create a very busy, hectic schedule for me this fall with all the boards I sit on, and meetings I attend with my job running the chamber of commerce. So, as I have begun to talk to my family, pray and evaluate my volunteering commitments and so forth I've decided that I will have to step down as Cubmaster of our local Cub Scout Pack in August once marching band realy takes off. So yesterday I let the appropriate couple of people know that I am going to be stepping down and I think they've seen it coming. People ask me all the time when I sleep and how many things I am involved with so I've obviously got too much going on, lol. Someone accused me the other day of running for office lol.

I have enjoyed scouting, working with the boys. But I have to say that there is a good bit of relief as I look forward to leaving all of the drama behind. There are some very troubling personalities within the adult leadership and I cannot say that I will miss that at all!

As I mentioned before, along with being an alcoholic and all the other important things about me, I am also to my core, a teacher and a musician. I believe God has blessed me with a musical gift (no, not Carnegie Hall/prodigy type gift) and a gift and love for teaching and helping kids grow. I had stopped playing and teaching professionally and amature-ly as my drinking and drugging got really bad back in 1994. I got sober in 1996 and didn't play regularly again until probably about 2006. It took me that long to reconcile with myself over "throwing away" a solid teaching and playing career. It's been difficult "getting back on the horse," feeling like I let myself down, like I let God down and so forth. Today, right now, I am scared to get this deep back into it but at the same time, I am excited and grateful. A really awesome thing about this growth in AA that's come to me is that we bought my son a trombone with some Christmas money and I am teaching him how to play it and he's interested in it.

AA works miracles and restores people to who they really are. I am so grateful.

5 comments:

drybottomgirl said...

What a gift and what a great opportunity for you to share your talent with others. You will have success, as I can feel your enthusiasm in your writing. I took eight years of piano, and still sit down and tinker when I visit my parents. I am glad you can teach and bond with your son through this special gift. Blessings!

The Turning Point said...

Follow your bliss. Doors will open
and dreams will come true.

Happy for you

Jim

Syd said...

You seem to have a lot to offer in many different ways. That is a gift. Follow your heart and your passions.

Enchanted Oak said...

I'm so glad for this opportunity for you! There's no telling where we can go in sobriety, as we get back on track with our God and our gifts.

chitowngreg said...

Sounds like a nice step back into what you love. Congratulations. The program really does work miracles!